50 Shades of “RED”

red picOK…I haven’t seen/read 50 shades of Gray…or 50 shades of anything …but I did hear that the “Gray” book is real kinky about weirdo sex and weirdo stuff in general…. So I thought it was time for a shot of 50 shades of Red about Sports, life, and misc. so here goes….

 

  1. RedBird Nation #1 anxiously awaiting spring training…all those articles about guys trying to make the team, about new squad members, about guys catching fungoes like Willie Mays, about pitch counts, pitch selection, time between pitches, the hot prospects…oh yea… the prospects that can play A ball this year, inane interviews with vets who are trying to act excited but really have their mind on getting back to relieve the baby-sitter, the millions of permutations of Cardinal lineups….yada-yada-yada…and we love it
  2. Red wins in College Football Polls—ranked #1 and #2 in 2015 Pre-season College Football are Ohio St & Bama (guess ya gotta have red jerseys !)
  3. Red-faced#1—a spokesman claims that ISIS is attacking since they don’t have jobs…ugh, all other colleagues of this speaker were severely red faced
  4. The Red QT signs really mean Quit Talking when paying u-just give us money
  5. The Red Devils Jayson Tatum is the real thing! He maybe the most recruited male player from the St. Louis area
  6. President McKinley wore a Red Carnation for luck every day….the only day that he missed was the day that he was assassinated
  7. The red-clad Badgers of Wisconsin are really an old-time Big 10 team considering the way that they pound the ball, pass sparingly, are huge in the line, play strong defense
  8. The 3 RED properties on the monopoly board have new names—Illinois Ave is now Orlando’s Disney World; Indiana is now Honolulu’s Waikiki Beach and Kentucky Ave is now Phoenix’s Camelback Mountain
  9. Red Berenson-an all-time Blues favorite—who could ever forget his 6 goals in 1 game!
  10. The #3 Pool Ball (which is red) should be the primary ball…why isn’t there a game of 3-ball instead of 8-ball ? or maybe when you sink the 3-ball you automatically win the game?
  11. The Circle K (in red) should be a sponsor at Busch Stadium III—when recording the K’s of any starting pitcher –put up a circle K—if you get six of them…free coffee for all the next day.
  12. The All-Time Cincinnati REDLegs lineup is—c-Johnny Bench; 1B-Ted Kluszewski; 2B-Joe Morgan; SS-Barry Larkin; 3B-Pete Rose; OF-Frank Robinson, George Foster, Eric Davis; SP-Bucky Walters; Closer-John Franco
  13. RedBird Nation #2—I hope that Mgr Mathany lets Kolton Wong just play 5-6 days a week.
  14. The red-octaganol stop signs, that we generally roll through in St Louis BUT they do slow us down, should be used by “tweeters” who have never played a sec of any competetive sport but rip others mercilessly…need to slow down
  15. Napheesa Collier of the Red Knights of IWA is being recruited by UConn—enough said about her ability.
  16. 14 teams in the MLB wear RED jerseys.
  17. Lighting the Red-Light are the Blues….but ….lets wait until Mar-Apr-May Seasons that makes or breaks the season.
  18. Red Meats are not good for us now….the Bob Ryan diet IS…moderation in all types of food and drink…there…it’s free medical advice…where can you get that ?
  19. Cutting through the red tape to file taxes is admirable for anyone that does it..we could have a flat tax …but (always a but)….many would lose jobs that exist during tax season
  20. Boston RED Sox new 3B- Pablo Sandoval is already being hit hard by the BoSox fans for his weight
  21. Red Auerbach was a one of a kind….can you imagine ANY coach lighting up a cigar when the win was “in the bag”, winning with multiple rosters over many years while using the same set of 7 plays to win championship after championship
  22. RedBird Nation#3- John Mozeliak should go into politics after baseball with his ability to communicate with the media and use words that are “fresh”
  23. I like the way that the NFL rep came to St. Louis to tell us that Stan K could move but then throws a RED herring that …yea, the NFL will support you if you build a new stadium…sorry…it can’t be both ways.
  24. The Red-clad U of Louisville had Scott Davenport as an asst for Denny Crum and Rick Pitino. He now coaches Bellarmine U. How many years must he have been an asst. there –Crum and PItino seem decades apart to me ??
  25. Red Skelton was maybe the BEST comedian—great delivery, multiple characters, funny jokes without vulgarity or profanity
  26. Apparently, a one-way ticket to the RED planet of Mars is available….are you signing up?
  27. The Jack is the only word of Jack-in-the-box in Red…..I remember as a kid that a “Jack” wasn’t exactly a compliment…the Jack that they portray is a cartoon character of sorts….the only real Jack to me is JACK CLARK to me….an old fashioned, imperfect man
  28. Mizzou Ath Dept is out of the red financially now. That will continue as the SEC network reaps in the dough….next step for Mizzou and the SEC and four other leagues will withdraw from NCAA..not particularly appealing to me.
  29. The Red-card of soccer should be used for NFL players who talk to players on the other team…..nothing good comes of it…..trying to intimidate the other team seems a bit juvenile to me.
  30. Red Ruffing won 273 games in the MLB for the started with BoSox and pitched a great deal for the NYY
  31. Detroit Red Wings haven’t won Stanley Cup since 2007-08 season… where did you go Scottie Bowman?
  32. Nebraska Football fans, wearing their RED, forced our Bo Pelini. Coach Pelini, who smiled as often as he saw his own shadow, won 9 games in each of his years….sure… he didn’t beat the real big boys…but heck…9 games…are those fans happy now?
  33. The Red Sign of DQ really means…dig quickly (into your wallet)
  34. In St Louis, the Hunt for Red October has come to mean that the Cards are expected to go deep in the post-season
  35. Red Barber had the Southern style of speaking …I really enjoyed his folksy descriptions of baseball games…he was meant to be HEARD
  36. Have the Red Communists become the Brown Communists in the 21st century?
  37. Let’s appreciate the fact that Red Schoendienst is still with us…..what a role model for these current baseball players.
  38. Recently when the STL Policeman realized that their car-cam was “on” …they yelled “RED” to signal their colleagues….wonder why the “tip off” word to their mates was so obvious…why not some word that was much more discreet?
  39. The Cards have thrown out the Red-carpet treatment for Jason Heyward…..I’m still withholding total judgment….my initial reaction is that he may hit a more HR (15-20), steal more bases, and be a positive force on the team in 2015. If he’s too good…we won’t be able to afford him as a free agent….so I guess that I want him to be good…but not too good ?!
  40. Red Bull opened its door in 1987…I would have guessed late 90’s ?
  41. Red Sox have 7 players listed in the top 100 prospects
  42. Now they say red wine burns fat cells while lots of beer burns brain cells…don’t worry wait about 10 years and it’ll be that red win burns brain cells and beer burns fat cells !
  43. The “reddest” state in the USA is N.Dakota (red = conservative voters)
  44. Red Cloud died in 1909 @ 88 years of age….wanta read a sad situation…read about this Indian chief.
  45. The Big Red of Cornell University is ranked in the top 10 “for value”
  46. Red-Bird Nation#4—relax –the Cards will lost at least 70x in the months of April through September…we can’t win every game or every series.
  47. Red-faced#2—yet another “issue” with Obamacare—now some will have to pay higher taxes due to this health care
  48. The red-gold of USC is suffering….they are the last place team in Mens Basketball in the PAC 12..or PAC 15 whatever it is…
  49. Don’t put a red line through the Billikens name….these mid-major schools have their good years…then rebuild…its great that those fan continue to support the team
  50. RED LIGHT– STOP

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