Bob Ryan takes on Sports and News

Now that the “news” career of Brian Williams has disappeared (permanently-forget that stuff about 6 months. AS I heard this morning in a sports comparison, if they had someone warmed up in the bullpen, Brian would have immediately been replaced). I think that it would be good for Mr. Williams to begin a sports/feature show of his own….that way, he could really mix in fact with fiction.

 Before we enjoy his new approach…some thoughts on news broadcasting…

Before the 1980’s the news was fact reporting from around the world with little commentary. Huntley/Brinkley/Cronkite – may have been able to sneak in some personal thoughts but generally it was straight off the ticker-tape. In the 1980’s, the news became “story telling”. Now…we all know story tellers…what makes them good to hear is their embellishment of facts…but. In such a way that it actually seems true. Heck…ALL of us embellish stories, stretch it some or stretch it a lot…some better than others…some more that others…some more blatant than others (we usually call these type of guys “BS’ers”)… some are very convincing that it is the truth. We do it to make the “stories” better. Welcome in Brian Williams into the same booth…That style became our national “news” broadcasts. John Stewart carried another step forward with his own personal satirical remarks about news events. O’Reilly gives his opening “take” on the news. So all of that being said….Brian Williams went too far with the so-called “news” reports. Now, we hear, he’ll be opening on a sports/feature show.

 We had the chance to observe this “special” Brian Williams show on Sports/Features….Brian now has more leeway in his “story telling”… So…..let’s see if you can determine which of these facts are TRUE or FALSE…no grade will be given since we’d all claim that we had a perfect score…you see ….all of us do have a bit of Brian Williams style in us….it just varies in the degree…grade fairly…or unfairly…it doesn’t matter…have fun.. Here we go….it’s either true or false.

 

  1. Brian says that since Jeter has retired that Albert Pujols has the most active hits of any current player
  2. Brian says that he didn’t have a chance to measure the PSI’s of the NE balls…so they must be illegal.
  3. Brian earned $10mil/year as the “lead Announcer” last year.
  4. Brian reports that Archie Moore is the only boxer to face Marchiano & Muhammed Ali
  5. Secret Reports are that Brian was actually “relieved” of his duties due to an incident in Ferguson—not Iraq. Reportedly, Brian out covering a story in Ferguson, was about ready to have his picture taken when he suddenly realized that he had to sneeze. He quickly yelled at the photographer, “Hands up, don’t shoot”. He claimed in his circles…that HE had started the now famous, if totally incorrect, expression that continues to this day!
  6. Brian reports that on Valentine’s Day this year there were 8 weddings at White Castle.
  7. Brian reports that John Caliperi has a salary exceeding the entire U. of Kentucky faculty
  8. Brian reports that John Jay will be a career Cardinal since he just signed for 2 years.
  9. A Goodwill Sweater jumped from $.58 to $20K in one day due to the fact that it had belonged to Michael Jackson.
  10. Brian reported that LeBron James has dropped to #22 in a recent “most favorite” athlete of the year vote.
  11. Brian reported that Mizzou Basketball was closer than SLU to regaining winning basketball on the court again and THAT it would happen this decade
  12. Brian Williams gave money to his alma mater, George Washington University, for use in the announcing program at the school.
  13.  Brian Williams reports that ST. Louisian’s are surprised about the Stadium issue.

 Ahh…ahh…no cheating….don’t look past here until ur done

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 Answers…

  1. Not even close…Albert would be 6th…who leads…Mr. Steroid Himself—A-Rod
  2. True and false…no one measures them. Were they legal…ur guess is as good as mine (which is that each ball probably varied in size)
  3. TRUE….not bad for a guy to read a teleprompter…oh wait….that skill of reading the teleprompter belongs to another person who reached a very high position in government with a splendid ability to read a teleprompter…guess who (no bonus points)?
  4. TRUE – the old Mongoose was around a llllooonnnnnggg time
  5. False….but ya never know how it got started.
  6. TRUE—guess the wedding party celebrated on Crave Cases for their “reception”
  7. Don’t know …but his $57.6 million salary would seem to cover most of them…of course, John receives additional “aid” from the Wildcat supporters as he recruits any 5 recruits that he wants each year. I’m wondering why his suits still look small on him?
  8. No way….once he hits the ripe old age of 30 and is a free agent…..have the Cardinals looked at him through a different set of lenses.
  9. Nope….it had belonged to Vince Lombardi. Do you really think that the Jackson family that has been squabbling over the millions left behind would donate anything to Goodwill?
  10. Yep…..it’s heck to get old (at 30!!)
  11. NO & YES….SLU will be .500 prior to the Tigers but it may happen this decade…better hurry only 5 years left. Wonder how big the bball crowds at Mizzou Arena will be by that time? Speaking of Mizzou Arena (once named Paige Arena). Paige Laurie recently announced her divorce after a couple years of marriage. This is a bit of a switch…. the male will be getting the payout (assuming no pre-nup)
  12. No again….Brian doesn’t have any college degree…he had a total of 18 hours from GW U and Catholic U….sounds like he had a real heavy load for 2 years
  13.  If you are…I’d suggest that you move to the next cave down the river.

Comments

  1. Coach Dunkman says:

    Hi Bob! Hope all is well. I’m wondering if you’re doing the early-out game this year on PrepCasts.

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